I think that meme about people (no names mentioned here) sticking their tongue so far out their mouth that they can almost suck their own earlobe is a well-impressive feat.
I always say that the more tongue your can squash between your clenched molars, the better.
When any tongue picture goes viral, not only does it give every quack out there the opportunity to diagnose nutritional deficiencies, candida, speculate on your drug and digestive habits, discuss the ins and outs of your oral fixation, but it just makes you seem far more interesting than you probably believe yourself to be.
I also love that fashion trend that’s been around since Clueless in 1995 and refuses to completely die – the one where the back of your trouser’s waistband sits just above the back of your knees. You know the one I mean.
It’s a look that lends the impression to everyone that you are cool. That there’s nobody cooler, never was, never will be. You’re so flipping legendary in fact, that you don’t even have to pull up your pants properly when you rolled out of bed and into them.
Your look encourages you to
toddle slump slowly around which means you’re likely to live longer than all the Type-A’s out there clamouring to be hipsters. It allows for a pause here – to hitch up a random swagger… chuck in a partial saunter there, for a bit of smooth playa cool, and don’t you know it, but with a little obstinacy you’re probably still be wearing that look well into your eighties.
With a fashion meme that’s lasted longer than bellbottoms did in the seventies, and competing with the mullet for length of trend, you’re well on your way to beating the macarena to death.
Think about an object, an activity, or a cultural phenomenon you really don’t like. Now write a post (tongue in cheek or not — your call!) about why it’s the best thing ever.